For a while now I’ve battled and battled with my faith. Almost to the point where I almost lost it. I believe faith in a power higher than ourselves helps ground me and helps me focus on what is important in my life.
Through these trials I’ve discovered I don’t identify with the modern church. Not even in the slightest. This is not coming from disappointment in the recent voting outcome in my state (I’m in North Carolina. Read up on Amendment One). This comes from years and years of struggling about what I really believe in.
Have I lost faith in a higher power? Not a bit.
Have I lost faith in “Christians?” Not all of them.
Have I lost faith in the church? A little bit.
But I can’t fault to the church with the thoughts and actions of a handful of misguided individuals. I just can’t be associated with it, and I don’t want to be.
I’ve come to terms with my own beliefs and I couldn’t be happier or more at peace. I don’t want to go through life making people believe I think one way when I don’t think that way. That’s unfair to me and others.
Time to stop pretending. Meditate on making this world better and what I can do to help, then take action. Walking away from the “church” and accepting my beliefs is the first step.